A Year of Dedication

Hello friends!
Golly, it's been a few months hasn't it?
Life has been a whirlwind of so many great things happening in the lives of the Janson fam and I hate how this blog took a back seat!
I'm happy to share that 2016 is already off to a great start and today's post, to get back into the swing of blogging, is going to be all about my word for this year!
2015's word was "content" and I have to shamefully admit, I did an awful job.
But it's a new year and with that comes new, fresh beginnings!
My word for 2016 is

Dedicate! Websters definition of this word is: "a feeling of very strong support for or loyalty to someone or something : the quality or state of being dedicated to a person, group, cause, etc."
The word dedicate FEELS strong; when I say it and more specifically, when I think about how I'm going to put it into action this year!
You see, I've recently taken a next step. To me, next steps are GOOD and as a follower of Jesus, I feel they are absolutely necessary. But this next step has required me to step out of my comfort zone and into an area that makes me, excited, yes, but also very nervous. But I constantly pray and meditate over my reasons for moving foward with this next step. I think of the cause, the people, and the Savior that I have such a "strong support" for. That I long to be a woman in Christ who is looked as loyal, strong and, well, dedicated.
When moments in this next step get hard (which they will), I want to remember how this word has helped set my soul on fire. I want to cling to this word this year!
I am so, super stoked for everything I feel Jesus is going to do in my life, my marriage, my friendships and in my new church! (By the way, check out DECIDEDchurch here!)
I urge each of you to think about a word that you want to be the theme of your year. I'd love to hear it so that I can be encouraging and praying for you!
2016 will be all you make it be friends.
Excited to be back!
Much, much love :)

I Love My Church!

Howdy friends!

Hoping that this post is finding you all well :)

The Jansons have been struggling with the cooties for almost two weeks now. The weather being cold and rainy doesn't help, although I LOVE a good snuggle on the couch :) We could most definitely use some prayers regarding our health :)   

So today at church we celebrated something pretty cool!

We celebrated 6 years, as a campus, in Columbia!

Eric and I are celebrating that it's been 2 years since we first started attending NewSpring!

WOW!! Time really does fly. 

The absolute BEST part of celebrating 6 years as a campus is that, in that frame, we have seen 8,423 salvations in Columbia. 

OH MY WORD!!!!

The sweetest part about that is how Eric and I are a part of that 8,423.

It was two months after we started attending NewSpring that we attended Ownership class. We were so hooked on this church that were excited to dive right in. (And also get some free Chic-Fil-A for dinner, haha!)

Little did we know that night in November that we would ask Jesus into our lives, side my side. I remember that night like it was yesterday.

The impact that this church has had, not only on my life, but my husbands life and now my daughter's life is remarkable! 

So in honor of 6 years AND 8,423 salvations, this post is about the top 5 (out of many!) reasons why I LOVE MY CHURCH!

Here we go:

1) We believe growing people change:

I was a mess when I first started attending NewSpring. I liked drinking way too much, I cursed like a sailor and my overall life making decision skills were just not up to par. I was so apprehensive to start attending yet another church that would look down upon me because I didn't have my life together. NewSpring embraced it. I have leaders and friends from church that are constantly telling me it's ok to not be ok. They encourage me to grow in my walk with Jesus, in my marriage and as a mother .They remind that my story is far from being over and that growing people ALWAYS change! 

2) Community:

I was so very alone when I first started attending church, as was Eric. The "friends" we had in our life at the time were no good. After being saved and letting some of those friendships go, life became lonely. I am SO thankful for a church that believes we can't do life alone. I have met some of my very dear and close friends through serving, small group and just being an attendee. Life with community and others to do life with is so much sweeter.

3) I am taught how to follow Jesus step by step:

Overwhelmed couldn't even describe how I felt the day after I met Jesus. "Now what??" were two words that pounded in my head over and over. How thankful I am that I belong to a church that doesn't leave me in the dark but provides wisdom about where to do from here. I'm taught that there is ALWAYS a next step in our walk with Jesus and I am spiritually fed each and every sermon I listen to. 

4) KidSpring:

I am SO SO SO thankful for KidSpring. I am in love with the idea that my daughter has a safe place to go to where she can learn about Jesus on HER level. At first, I found it odd that kids, under a certain age, couldn't attend the regular service. But after learning what KidSpring is all about, I couldn't be happier that Makenna is being taught the gospel, even at 13 months old. I applaud every staff member and volunteer that puts in the time and energy to make KidSpring what it is :)

5) We believe FOUND people FIND people:

I LOVE what NewSpring is after; to reach 100,000 in the state of SC. To show others the good news that is Jesus Christ. I love, love, love seeing others asking Jesus into their lives. It reminds how I first felt when I was saved and how freeing it was. We, as a church, KNOW how miraculous, amazing, supernatural, loving and graceful our God is. We are on a mission to reach those far from God!

Jesus has and keeps using NewSpring to reach me in ways I never knew I could be reached. NewSpring has truly been used to save my life and to help us grow as a family. I love watching how Jesus changes our hearts. I love watching my husband, week after week, do what he does best in ministering to people. I love picking my daughter up from KidSpring, knowing that she is growing up in an environment where she can learn to follow Him. I absolutely love my church :)

Any questions about NewSpring? Want to attend or watch online?

Check out www.newspring.cc

Happy Sunday all!

Much love :) 

A Little Transparency

Hey friends!

It has been such a while since I've posted!

Life has been busy and filled with so much! We have settled into our new home more nicely than I could have ever planned. Our house has never felt more like, well, home! The two years it took to finally get in here has been more than worth it. I love making memories in this home. Good is SO good!

Also, our sweet baby, Makenna, turned one on August 14th and life with a toddler has been, well, exhausting but absolutely amazing :) She is learning and growing so much every day and I love being able to be her mommy. 

So, jumping right into it, I am going to be totally honest. 

I had an entirely different post planned, typed and ready to publish. Normally after I am done writing the draft for a post and have proofed it, I automatically publish it without any second thought of the topic. But this time was so different. My iPad kept messing up and it literally would not post. 

You bet your bottom dollar I took that as a sign from God to rethink what I wanted to post about and have be seen by the public eye.

My deleted post was all about disappointment and all the things that have been getting me down lately. After my iPad kept glitching, all it would let me do is go back to the draft so I reread the post and it really hit: "oh my gosh, how WHINY do I sound?! I can't post this! Is this really the Jesus I want people to see in me?!!"

It kept me up till after midnight, last night, thinking about how much I look over everything I've ever been blessed with. I've focused on the negative for so long that it's starting to become normal. When did I start developing this glass half empty attitude?? This is NOT me!

I jumped out of bed, lit a candle in the living room and wrote out, in my journal, all of the disappointments I was going to post about. Under each of them, I wrote the positives. 

I wrote how God can, is or will take these disappointments and turn them into something beautiful.

A few examples:

Disappointed by friends?

 Lately, I've been focusing on the friendships that have faded away, the feeling of being left out or forgotten. I needed to write this out in front of me and really pray over the many friends and family that Jesus has blessed me with. That He can always continue to work in my heart to be a good friend or daughter, wife or sister. I have many people in my life and in my little family's life that are so beautiful inside and out. I am more than thankful for these people. 

Disappointed by what's on the news?

Use that as fuel! Fuel to get out and be proactive. What I see on the news should give me, a follower of Jesus, more incentive to get out and spread the Good News. To lead others from death to life. Instead of filling my mind and heart up with fear because of what is happening in this world, I need to take a moment, look up and thank Jesus for the life He has given me. How blessed I am to live so free and GOOD! To have a hot shower and dinner every.single.day. Ok, so the dog may pee on the floor or the guy in traffic who cut me off, gave me the finger. Things could be SO MUCH WORSE.

Lastly..

These past few months (ok, maybe more than a few) I have been thinking of my old life back in NY. This was a place I was born and raised in for almost 20 years. I up and left, never looking back and have only returned 3 times since 2009. This was one of the last disappointments I wrote about last night.

I miss it. I really do! 

I watch shows or movies based out of NYC and my heart literally hurts. I think of how life would've been if we had moved us to NY. What would my marriage, with Eric, be like? Would Makenna even be here with us? It even hurts my heart now to write about it.

But I thought about our life here in South Carolina. I think about how much Eric and I have grown up here. 

I think about NewSpring.

How ABSOLUTELY grateful am I for this church?! 

What would life have been life if we moved to NY, never have attending NewSpring??

Jesus has used this church over and over and over and over (you get the point) to bring us closer to Him. Goodness, it's where Eric and I were both saved, almost TWO years ago, side by side!

I think of KidSpring and how my daughter goes to a safe environment each week and learns about Jesus on her level. Where volunteers take time to nurture and pray over her every week. 

Would we have found that in NY?

My roots are there; memories that will never be forgotten and people who may have only been in my life for a season, but have made a difference. 

But we are meant to be here, in South Carolina. This is where Jesus needs us to be. This is where He, currently, has us living out His plan. Meditating on that alone overwhelms my heart with joy. 

I absolutely love where God has my little family right now. I love where He has me.

I love looking back at harder times and what I learned from that situation. I love looking at a list of "disappointments" and how He can point out the good that can be found in everything.  

Doesn't mean more disappointments won't arrive at my door. The point isn't that, being a follower of Jesus means hard times won't come..it means when they do come, I can handle them with His strength, grace and love!

The best is yet to come my friends..the best is yet to come :) 

MUCH love! 

All I need is You

How can I truely be happy?

Will a new car make me happy?
Well, yes.

Will buying a home make me happy?
Of course!

Will having more money make me happy?
Yes it would!

Honesty time..
I have been so caught up in my "wants" lately. Wanting a home, more money, a newer car, nicer clothes, a smaller waistline, etc.
My want and to do list are growing bigger as my time and relationship with Jesus is growing smaller.

Last night at my small group we talked about what our top 3 priorities were. I listed mine as:
1) Family
2) New house
3) Jesus

WHOA! After I read my priorities out loud, in my head I questioned myself why I put our new home (and even family) before Jesus. Sure, I said Him first to my small group ladies but on my piece of paper I wrote Him third.
I've been wanting this home for so long that I've forgotten where my true happiness lies...and it's not in material things. Even a beautiful home.
I've been so focused on my marriage, Makenna and family (which there is nothing wrong with at all) but have completely forgotten to spend and set aside time for the One who is my rock. My foundation!
I'm so worried about checking social media, my email and worrying about my to do's when I first wake up that I haven't started to my day with Jesus and in prayer in a long time.
No wonder I'm so on edge all the time!!
I've had all these "things" distracting me that have completely made me lose focus on spending time with God-my true happiness! It's so easy to fall into this trap but can be harder to get out.

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit."
-Romans 15:13

I want to Jesus to be the ONLY thing that can complete me and the only thing that can truely fill me with peace and joy! Everything else should just be an added blessing and gift from Him, which they are!
It's a decision and choice that I need to make every single day that Jesus is going to be at the very, very top of my priority list! He's worth that much (and more)!!!
Spending more time in His word and working to form even more of a deep relationship Him is a great place to start :)
I am so thankful to have a God that never stops chasing me. He is the only one who will ever be able to give me an endless supply of love and grace.

Some food for thought! Happy Wednesday :)

4 things in 4 years

Marriage has taught me a lot.
Whether I've liked it or not, marriage has changed me.
I mean, duh!
That's usually what's expected when two people makes vows for forever.
And in the case of my marriage, two more opposite people couldn't have been paired together.
Eric and I have been married for almost 4 years. (It'll be 4 years next month!!!)
Life with him as my partner has been frustrating. annoying, humbling and nothing short of absolutely, positively amazing!
So in an early honor of almost 4 years with the love of my life, here are the 4 major things (in no specific order and trust me there's more than 4) that marriage has taught me.

1) Jesus really DOES need to be in the center
SERIOUSLY! Ok so some kind of order..but this is the most important! Eric and I have seen what marriage is like without Him as the center (and w/out Him in general) more than we have seen our marriage with Him as the center and let me tell you..Jesus being at the center of our marriage makes it better than I could have imagined. The Lord uses Eric as a vessel to reach me every.single.day. I love watching us grow closer in this way!

2) Intimacy is key
Kids, cover your ears and look away. Haha, not but really this is SO true. And I have no shame in talking about something so natural! This is another part of our marriage where we've seen opposite sides of the spectrum. Meaning: there have been dry spells and there have been not. God created sex for man and wife to really enjoy and spend a intimate, special time with one another. Lack of this can and has affected us. This aspect of our relationship has been pushed way up to the top of the priority list.

3) Communication is more than important
It's what can make or break a marriage! Without communication, what is there? Eric and I learned even before we married of how much talking to one another is SO important! It was a few weeks before we were married; Eric and I were in a huge argument and it just happened to be while my parents were visiting. They caught on fast and literally made us sit down, face each other, and talk. We haven't been able to hush up since then, haha!

4) Surrounding yourself with positive people (and couples) DOES matter
Eric and I don't come from great friendships when we first got together and when we were first married. It wasn't until we became parents-to-be that we really started to let go of the negative energy that seemed latched onto us and our marriage. Being around marriages and relationships that encourage us (and that we see encourage each other) is super important and something we had to learn the hard way. For me personally, it's hard to be around other women that talk nothing but negatively about their husbands. It had a big affect on me for a while!



I can think of SO many things that marriage has taught me in almost 4 years. I've learned how Eric needs to be loved and vice versa. When I say Eric is my best friend, I mean Eric is my BEST friend. He's the one person I can tell every single thing there is about me or something that's going on. My love for him grows every day and I can't wait to see what the next 4, or 40 years brings us!
Marriage is amazing and I am so thankful for how it's developing me as a person.



Anything to add? Let's chat: gfmamaj@gmail.com :)
Much looooove!

                                         

Hey Lonely Mama

Hey friends!
So there is something that has been on my heart that I would love to get out there.

Motherhood has been so fantastic.
So beautiful, so humbling, so sweet and
so lonely.
Weird describing word huh?

Now I love being a stay-at-home mama.
I am so unbelievably blessed to have a husband that works so hard during the week so that he's able to provide for his family. I am so proud of him and thankful that I am blessed to stay home and raise Makenna. I am also blessed to have my parents so close to me to help out with Makenna when I need a second to myself.
But there's something that stay-at-home mama's don't want to talk about or don't want to admit in fear of seeming ungrateful...it's this sense of crushing loneliness that comes over our lives like a wave.
I've realized that motherhood can be so lonely.

I had so many plans for Makenna and I before she was born. We would grow up as close as my mom and I did, have long & deep conversations about faith and Jesus (we still have a little bit to go with that), we would experience so many firsts together and... we would make a ton of mommy and baby friends. 
I had pictured in my head of all the fun things I wanted to do with my future mommy friends: play dates all the time, library trips, day trips, duo family getaways.. I was certain going into motherhood that it would be a time in my life where I would make friends that I would consider soul sisters! I had always dreamed of having friends like that.
But now? Now that Makenna is almost 11 months old, I look around when I'm at the mall, the park or even at my church and I get sad (even a little jealous) at the close knit groups of parents that there are. Talking and laughing with each other, their kids playing around like they are siblings.

This is not me saying I have no friends, because I do! But life is busy and we all have different schedules. There are just not enough hours in the day sometimes for play dates, or wine whining to each other. Money can be tight for a lot of us to take that duo family vaca I long for. I am so grateful for the handful of mama (and non mama) friends I can count on but sometimes it's just not enough; I want more.
Selfish?
Sure!
Honest?
Brutally.
On a side note, to have great friends, you must be a great friend and I've been asking Jesus to help my heart understand and act out on this.

I'm sure this is just a funk or a phase; something I'm bound to move past.
I am trying to cherish this time as much as I humanly can. This time where Makenna constantly needs me, my attention and my love because I will never have these moments with her again.
But..
If you're a lonely mama reading this, just know you're not alone and it's OK to feel this way.
This can just be a difficult time in our life to make new friends and sometimes keep them. Sometimes I feel like making new friends is harder than dating!!
Feeling lonely in a crowded room is not uncommon and I understand it.
I hope and pray by reading this post you know that there is somebody else out there feeling the same way you do and know, this too, shall pass.

So much to you all <3

Love Never Fails

Hey friends.

I had been staring at this blank space for almost 20 minutes and I am still at a loss as to how to start this post.

Then I thought of a question that was asked of me at church yesterday, when the topic of all that has happened in this country the past week and a half came up; "Amanda, what do you think?"

Wow.

What DO I think?

I've been blown away as to all that has gone on in American in almost two weeks.

It's overwhelming to see it all over the news and social media; just seeing opinion after opinion, hate followed by more hate and country on edge with major tension in the air.

So what do think??

I think I'm sad.

I'm sad with how we treat each other, I'm sad with how much hate we show each other. This is not the world I ever imagined my children growing up in. 

After reading A LOT of blog posts (specifically Christian) about the Supreme Court's decision regarding gay marriages, I promised myself to not post another post about "now we just have to show love."
Because it's not that easy to feel it, as it is to say it.

Because some disagree.

Some don't approve and some are saddened by this decision because of what THEY believe. 

And you know what?

That's OK!

Yes I said it. It's completely ok to disagree with someone...

...and still NOT show hate.

It's ok to debate with somebody and still NOT show hate. Because the moment we (I'm talking to you, my fellow Christians) start to show the opposite of what Jesus really looks like, we lose the magnitude of our cause and beliefs.

Yes I know what the bible says about homosexuality...

but I also know what it says about judgement and love.

"Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen."

*1 John 4:20

Hey guys..it's right there! ^^ Right there in the book we so love, in the book we so believe in and in the book that we use WAY TOO OFTEN to hide behind and spew our own hate.

So yes, this is another post about love because that is what we are called to do by the One who loved us first. He had no exceptions and neither should we. 

It's hard. I'm not kidding. When I first heard the news of the shooting in Charleston, I felt anger. When I saw others fighting over the Confederate flag, I felt anger. And when the Supreme Court announced their decision to legalize gay marriage, I felt anger. BUT I, almost, immediately dropped to my knees (literally, I did!) and asked Jesus for an immediate change of heart; to let this be my chance to showcase Him through me. And, oh my, has He delivered on that request. 

I have so many opinions about a lot that goes on in this country.

And I completely believe that it is totally ok to express those opinions in a manner that shows respect and love because at the end of the day we need to all remember we are ALL children of God, we ALL are underserving of grace but it's in the end that His grace that unites us. (Thanks for the thought Pastor P!!)

You sin. I sin. We all sin. To Jesus, NO sin is greater than the other. Sin is sin and regardless of what it is we do to sin, Jesus STILL loves us! ALL of us! 

Christians, this is our chance, our opportunity to show love that Jesus places in all of us regardless if we agree with somebody decisions or lifestyle. 

Do I sound like a broken record?

Good, because I want it to sink in. Because the hate HAS TO STOP! We take complete advantage of each other and the fact that we live in the greatest country on earth! 

I challenge you all to go outside your comfort zone this week. Do something nice for someone that you normally wouldn't do. Show love to someone you normally wouldn't show love to. Ask Jesus to change the direction of your heart from hate and judgement to love! 

Love WILL always overcome because Christ will always overcome! 

Any questions, comments, or just want to chat?

gfmamaj@gmail.com :)

Much, much love to each of you!